The McDonald's ... Gang?

A week or so ago Jackie Chan and I were walking down the street together and said to me "Mom, do you know the game Grand McMuffin?"

So I said, "No babes, I don't. I've never heard of that game before. Are they giving it out at McDonald's?"

He whipped his head around and looked at me like I had suddenly morphed into a dragon with three heads wearing a nightie and said, "Mom, McDonald's doesn't give out video games, they give out toys from movies. You know, movies ... that are in the theater ... they give out the toys from those movies."

So I'm like "yeah, I know buddy ... it's just that McDonald's has like people like mascots, ya know ... Ronald McDonald ... and Mayor McMuffin is one of those guys ... so I thought I was a game about him ..."

(Blank stare from Jackie Chan)

"Seriously. McDonald's has like a whole gang of mascots that are like McDonald's people ... ya know, they'd be around at birthday parties and stuff and on the bibs and the high chairs in the restaurants ... "

(More blank staring)

"Forget it ... they were a big deal when Mommy was younger ... I guess they're not so well known now. Anyway ... I have no idea what Grand McMuffin is, sorry buddy."

And Jackie Chan says, "No Mom, it's a real video game ... Liam has it."

So I sigh and say, "maybe Liam is lying to you baby ... I don't know much about video games, but I know I've never heard of Grand McMuffin."

Jackie Chan is clearly frustrated with me at this point and says, "Mom, it's real. Liam plays it and he says you have to steal things and beat people up and kill cops to win the game and I just want to know why he plays it ..."

When the realization of what he's talking about hits me I am no longer able to walk. I am doubled over - totally inappropriately - laughing at what he has just said.

"OHHH," I say, "Grand THEFT AUTO!"

Jackie Chan: YES!!!!

"Baby I have NO idea why Liam is allowed to play that game. That is a terrible game. It's full of terrible, awful things that kids should NOT be allowed to do."

I watch his little brow furrow as he takes in this information ... so I keep going. I explain that there is no way a child should have access to a game with such violence and disregard for the law. That even some adults shouldn't play it because there are a lot of adults who don't know right from wrong and fact from fiction and stuff like that. And that video games that look so real can be really confusing and may even lead a person - who would otherwise lead a normal, jail free life - to do things they shouldn't. Like spontaneously steal a car and run over innocent people on the sidewalk. Or drive into the wrong part of town in a stolen car just to start a fight. Or eat a lot of fast food in order to keep their energy levels up. And join gangs.

And I tell him that I wish I was Liam's Mom so I could tell him that he shouldn't play that game, but I'm not so I can't ... but that I can keep my own son from ever playing anything like that.

And Jackie Chan's little face was full of questions and he was very, very deep in thought.

So I said, "do you have something you want to say or something you want to ask Mommy?"

And he nodded. And he said, "Um, Mommy, does Mayor McMuffin LOOK like Ronald McDonald?"