School ...

The beginning of the school year is always an exciting time.

It's a time when kids look forward to being back at school - anxious to meet old and new friends.

Jackie Chan spent Monday running around the house looking for his pencil case - long forgotten and shoved under the bed last June.  His lunch box has once again found its place on the kitchen counter where it will remain each night for the next ten months.  (And the frantic panic on Monday night of what to put in the lunch box the next day was indicative of what happens during most of the school year.)

Kids await the newness of a different classroom and a different teacher either with an eagerness bordering on hysteria or with terror.  But, regardless, it seems as though new expectations are carried in on the crisper, cooler air ... like a message of hope of things to come.

On Tuesday morning it felt to me like all the failings of the previous school year - both by we the parents and by Jackie Chan - were long forgiven and forgotten.  And in my eyes, Jackie Chan was starting fresh.  A new school year.

I vowed there would be no battles, no mishaps.

Yesterday on his first day of school he fell down the stairs at last recess and shredded his elbow.  Major cuts and scrapes.  Nasty.

BUT ... he didn't cry.  At ALL.

Good steps, I think.

I was proud of him.

Then this morning we had an epic battle.

An epic battle about "appropriate" gym wear.

It was cold this morning and Jackie Chan was standing in his room (ten minutes after I sent him in to get dressed) in his underwear holding a pair of shorts.  

I explained - calmly, keeping in mind my vow to avoid battles - that shorts were not appropriate for school given the weather and that he should put on pants ...


"But I have gym today."

"What does that have to do with shorts??"


"I have to wear appropriate gym clothes.  I can't wear jeans.  I have to wear something for gym."

"So what, in your mind, is appropriate to wear for gym?"


He throws up his hands, holding the pair of shorts in one hand, and yells, "shorts."

"Shorts may be appropriate for gym, but they are not acceptable to wear to school today because it's too cold outside for shorts.  Are you going to wear shorts when it's thirty three degrees below zero?  Will shorts be appropriate then?  Will the gym teacher take responsibility for you when you are hospitalized for pneumonia? ... who told you what to wear for gym today?"


"No one told me, it was on the board for us to write in our agenda so we would know it was gym and we would know that we had to wear not jeans."

"We would know that we had to wear something other than jeans ... is the appropriate way to say that.  Moving ON .... you need to bring your agenda home so that I know what's going on.  So that I can help you be "appropriate" for gym and class, etc.  Help me HELP you.  And I'm helping you now by telling you that you are not wearing shorts.  You can wear jeans.  If the gym teacher has a problem then I will go and speak to the gym teacher about the in-appropriateness of a teacher telling a child to dress in-adequately for the weather because the child needs to be appropriately dressed for a thirty minute class and isn't allowed time to change before the class begins!!!  Got it?????"

*Tears*

"Seriously.  Jackie Chan.  You didn't cry when you tore the skin off your elbow, but you're crying now? Over shorts?  Why?"


"I don't want to get in trouble.  I need to wear something appropriate for gym.  I can't wear jeans because I need to be able to move.  I can't move in jeans but I can move in shorts.  I don't want to wear jeans and get in trouble."

"Oh my goodness - FINE!  Wear the shorts.  FREEZE.  I don't care!!!!!  Just get dressed.  And when we get to school I will go to the office - on the second day of school - and speak to the principal about what he or she thinks is appropriate gym wear and how I should go about ensuring my child is dressed appropriately for both the weather and gym simultaneously!!!  OK????????"


"OK."

"OK."


"Um Mommy?" 

"Yes?"


"So I should wear shorts????"

"ARRRGGGHHHHHHH!!!"

And so began the second day of school ...

I don't think we'll avoid battles.  Jackie Chan battles because he believes he should stand up for what he feels is right.  I can hardly fault him for that.